Forgive me mother...

I haven't let the pain out yet...
forgive me mother for that I have sinned..
I can't let the pain out yet... Not yet...
You know I'll die inside...leading me for an outside death as well
I've hidden your death from myself...
I've forgotten the bad moments...
weak...I'm waiting for a better days
for a lonely beach or cemetery and a vision of myself on my knees...
I must keep my tears for surviving...for the wound is great, and if I bleed I'll dye
Forgive me mother because I have sinned...
but your eyes keep me thinking your alive...
so well alive inside my heart...
I cannot accept it..
I am not ready yet...
I need more time, more strength, more reasons...
To support the pain...

I know I have to live without you...
I know I have to be in love without you,
I know i have to get married without you,
I know...
I know I have to be a father some day without you...
but I just can't believe it... not yet....I need a shoulder,
I need an embrace
Forgive me mother for loving you...
give me mother the strength to live without you having you inside...
Forgive me mother for that I have sinned